Since January 7th 1973
11:00am –
Ace and his seven-man unit surge out of their squad van and into the double doors. Ace’s knowledge is bleak, only knowing that there is one man wreaking havoc amongst the occupants and rescue workers inside. Bellhops and maids flee the hotel with tears and ash on their faces. His unit makes way to the staircase, with heartbeats louder than the fire alarms screeching though the halls…
He counts the bullets as they fire, and the men in blue as well. All of this in hope to avenge what he sees as corruption. He enters a seemingly vacant room, bypasses the two African American housekeeping workers, and looks out the window to see two men with the crescent and star on their chest. Soon the .44 folds the badge and like a poorly made paper airplane, the men fall off their ladder. He enters the stairwell and heads to the rooftop…
11:15am-
The assailant hears Ace and his unit ease open the six inch metal door atop the Howard Johnson. At this, he turns around and riddles the door with his military issued M-16 Rifle. The bullets stop, and the clank of the clip falls to the cement rooftop. Ace takes the cue, and charges at the shooter. With a leap forward, Ace takes a shot that rips through his thigh and soars into the clouded sky. Ace comes down onto the shooter, and avenges the loss of his brothers in blue lost that day; one 9mm to the shin and one to each shoulder. His unit and the helicopters finish the job…
Seven days into 2003, the once off white and orange, stands beige. Resting on its side, a clarinet. And so, playing its own tune to hide the echoes of gunfire from that day. Seven days into 2003, the once medal adorned man in navy, stands guard with a royal apron saving nothing but the glares given to him when greeting a man with a simple “welcome.” And so, welcoming only the ability to forget the echoes of gunfire and anguish experienced that day.
Using a historical event as a basis for fiction provides you with the events and the characters but also creates a certain obligation to them. In a short piece, you want to limit the POV to one character (this shifts from Ace to "the assailant" in the second section. This begins well, but keep it real and clear (who is thinking about "avenging what he sees as corruption"?
ReplyDeleteI'm assuming the man in navy is Ace--why not tell us? The structure is problematic: fifteen minutes between section one and two, then a jump of thirty years in section three. Develop this, perhaps by opening and ending with the building in 2003, with the events of 1973 as flashback. Good link to the story, and photo.